Terre Pruitt's Blog

In the realm of health, wellness, fitness, and the like, or whatever inspires me.

  • I teach Nia! THREE group classes a week!

    Tues, and Wed 9 am

    Thurs 8:45 am

    Please see my website for details! I sub for the City of San Jose and the YMCA so check my website for dates and times!

    I am also available for private Nia and/or Personal Training!

  • Enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

  • My Bloggey Past

  • ******

    Chose a month above to visit archives, or click below to visit a page.

I Could Use To Get “Smarter Every Day”

Posted by terrepruitt on April 22, 2014

I am not a science person, although I love the science of cooking and understand that you do certain things and use certain ingredients to get a specific outcome. I don’t know a lot about science. I don’t even claim to KNOW about the science of cooking, I just like it. I think some science is interesting. When I say I don’t know a lot about science I am admitting to not knowing what some might think of as basics. So this video that my friend posted on her Facebook page not only entertained me, but educated me. I thought it was really cool. I thought it was a great way to explain it to kids and people. I really loved the liquid in the jar. I also laughed because, if what he said is true, now it makes sense why my mom was always so “stuffy” in the front seat and I was always so cold and felt like I was being wind blown in the back seat.

With the way Facebook is working lately the a picture of the video is on her wall, but there was a link to another person’s blog post. Below is the video of Destin showing his kids some “Fluid Mechanics”. I put that in quotes because that is what he calls it, and again, that is not something I know. Listen to the end so you can hear his speel about a free audio book.

 

Also click over to his site Smarter Every Day where you can read stuff to help make you smarter every day.

In the blog post Prepare to Have Your Mind Blown by a Balloon and a Minivan Robert T. Gonzalez explains in detail what is going on in the van. I didn’t read his entire post because I was satisfied with Destin’s explanation. This link is actually what my friend had posted on Facebook.

I did click over from Destin’s Youtube page to read his post regarding Re: People confused by children who say “Yes Sir” which I enjoyed and I thought was well written.

So the funny thing about this is as I mentioned I learned a lot and I learned why my mom was always stuffy while I was freezing whenever we went somewhere in the car with my parents. As I was watching the video I thought, “Dang! I can’t tell her. But this makes sense”. When my hubby and I would go places with my mom and dad we usually would all pile into their vehicle with my hubby and I in the back seat. My mom would always claim to be “stuffy”. Ya know a little more than hot as if there is not enough air around you . . . it seems a little difficult to breathe? We call that “stuffy”. We say, “I feel stuffy. Or, “the air is stuffy.” Well, now I know why.  When the car is moving the air goes to the back.

Whether you know this stuff or not I hope you watch the video because it is entertaining.  I think I have seen Destin’s stuff before, but I forget about it.  I could watch it and read it and I am sure I would get a little smarter every day.  I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did.  Thanks, Destin!

Well, what did you think?  Did you know this?  Don’t you think this is a great teaching tool (the experiment)?

Posted in Misc | Tagged: , , , , , , , | 4 Comments »

Still Dealing With Death

Posted by terrepruitt on April 19, 2014

Truth. This is not from Trainer Terre or Nia Teacher Terre, this is from The-Daughter-Who-Spent-All-Day-Cleaning-Out-Her-Mothers-Closets. Note: this is the second time I’ve type this as my laptop shut down on me. So now all I can say is that I was ok until we watched 47 Ronin which ends in everyone dying — even those in love – and it was more than I wanted to deal with after having gone through a couple of closets and drawers of my mother’s. It was obvious that my mom loved a bargin. Yet she was very fashion conscious. That she cared for her bargins was evident from how she washed her clothes on the delicate wash cycle and how so many of her things were hung up inside out. It was obvious how much she cared for the clothes no matter how much they cost. It was obvious – to me – that she thought she would be around a lot longer to enjoy said wardrobe.

Dance Exercise, Nia, Nia at the City of San Jose, Nia classes in the South Bay, Nia Teacher, Nia Class, San Jose Nia, Nia San Jose, Nia workout, Nia, Zumba, PiYo, Gentle YogaAs I went through each item, so obviously and lovingly cared for, I thought of how much she would have been happy to pass these clothes on to someone who would love them and get use out of them. But we all have our own feelings and ideas of wearing clothes from a dead person’s wardrobe. Many people I contacted were very hesitant. I don’t fault them that, as I said, we all have our own feelings and ideas.

But one person’s response brought tears to my eyes. I told her that I might have shoes for her (depending on her size) and that there were earrings that had her name on them. I asked her if she was she interested. She said, “I’d be honored.” After having seen how well my mom took care of her clothes and stuff. And after seeing all the cute shoes she had that I can’t wear because she had such a small foot. After experiencing that weird feeling of, “this person was keeping things for a life yet to be lived”. It was so wonderful to hear that someone would be grateful to receive stuff from her. It made me so happy to think that my mom’s stuff would be enjoyed. Those three simple words made me humbled to be related to such a woman that would speak them. Those words also made me determined to wear stuff from my mom’s closet and fashion jewerly stash to the family’s Easter celebration tomorrow. I pictured myself standing tall in one of my mom’s color coordinated top ensembles with the dangly fashion gold earrings sparkling as I swished my proud-to-be-my-mamas-daughter-head about! —All this from my cousin’s exclamation.

Thank you, Cousin for helping me though this. Thank you for helping me feel like my mom and the way she lovingly took care of the stuff that mattered to her matters to someone else too. It is very difficult to get rid of things that a loved one had and cared for. When such items can be passed on to someone that will get use of of them, it makes it seem less of a loss–to me.

How do you feel? So you think it is great to pass stuff on? Do you want to just throw stuff away? Do you pass it on to Goodwill? Do you keep it forever? What do you think?

 

Posted in Diane Bacho | Tagged: , , , , , , | 2 Comments »

Memorial Page

Posted by terrepruitt on April 17, 2014

Dance Exercise, Nia, Nia at the City of San Jose, Nia classes in the South Bay, Diane Bacho, Memorial page, Beautiful momA gathering for my mom is not going to be held until way later, at least four months from now. My father wants it to be after summer and I am not sure why, but at this time that is his present idea. We will see. Things are in flux right now. The “plans” we think we have get changed along with the ideas, so we will see. But regardless of exactly when we have it, it will be, as I said, months from now. I don’t know if it will be big or small . . . I imagine when something is held so many months after a death less people will attend . . . I don’t know. Anyway . . . . since I don’t know what will be happening, I thought I would put a page on my blog for her. I have had a few people share some stories or memories of my mom and they brought a smile to my face. It is nice to hear nice stories.

She was my mom, but as with anyone, you never know everything about them. Plus people have different perspectives so it is always nice to hear how a loved one touched someone’s life. So if you would like to share a story or a memory of my mom, that would be really nice. Share it as a comment on the Memorial Page “Diane Bacho – 1948 – April 11, 2014“. I will be moderating the comments, just because there are spammers and scammers. If you don’t have a blog you might be surprised to know some of the things that people comment. I am sure that just because this is about sharing memories of a deceased person that will not stop the spammy comments. So, once you type it, it will not show until I approve it. Again . . . I am requiring the comments be moderated just to keep the spam out, so please feel free to share whatever you like – just understand it won’t show up right away. IF for some reason you don’t want me to make your memory/story public that is ok too, but make sure that you type that in the comment and I won’t “approve it” for publication, I can just read it myself. Or share it with family accordingly. If you have already sent me a note, via FaceBook, or e-mail, would you do it again on the page? Please.

Also, I am thinking I will probably end up sharing a few of the stories (I am hoping there will be at least a few) at whatever type of gathering we end up having . . . whenever that will be. If you think of something after you share one comment, please feel free to comment again. The more the better. My father is not on Facebook and who knows if he ever will be. That requires him to sign up and blah, blah, blah, but my blog he can just look at. He does not have to sign up to see it, so if he chooses to check it out he will be able to read the stories and the memories. Not sure he will want to, but . . . it will be here for him if he does. So . . . please . . . share something.

Thank you.

And again, I want to thank you all for all of your support, it has been a God-send and has helped me more than you will ever know.

Share comments on the
Diane Bacho – 1948 to April 11, 2014 page.

 

Click here to go to the page or click on the page name above (Diane Bacho – 1948 to April 11, 2014)

Posted in Diane Bacho | Tagged: , , , , , , , | Leave a Comment »

11:00 PM, Friday, April 11, 2014

Posted by terrepruitt on April 12, 2014

I posted some information on Facebook, but there are Nia students that are not on Facebook, but who read my blog. There are also yoga students who I am not friends with on FB who read my blog . . . and there are many of you who have sent love and support while my mom was dying. I am very grateful for all of the love, support, stories . . . and just everything that has been sent to my family and me. It has helped me more than you know. I will probably go back and tell the story of my mom’s last two years (or so) just because I really feel like sharing the story of the brave woman that she was. Also, it will serve as therapy for me and as a log. I will probably share more about my feelings on this whole “process of dying” that so many people just accept as the way it has to be. I do not agree nor do I feel it is an acceptable way for someone to spend their last days on this earth. The purpose of this post, though is to share with you that my mom died around 11:00 pm on Friday, April 11, 2014.

Dance Exercise, Nia, Nia at the City of San Jose, Nia classes in the South Bay, Nia Teacher, Nia Class, San Jose Nia, Nia San Jose, Nia workout, Nia, Zumba, PiYo, Gentle YogaThe hospital called me at a few minutes before 1:00 am on Saturday, April 12, 2014. So I keep thinking date of death is today, but I was told it was about 11:00 pm on Friday. I don’t know the exact time, but that is not all that important. What is important is that she is done with the twelve days of the “process”.

She went to the hospital on Saturday, March 22, 2014 because she could not breathe. They placed a tube in her throat to open the airway because they thought that they would be able to do more for her on the Monday. But her team of doctors decided that there really was nothing more they could do. One of her doctors was willing to perform a very risky surgery if my mom elected to go that route, but she did not. So she was told that she needed to pick a day to die . . . the conclusion reached by her medical team was that once the tube was removed her damaged trachea would collapse shortly there after and death would be relatively quick.

It was a common occurrence though, for my mother to not do anything according to what the doctors have previously experienced or think would happen. That is just how it has always been. She reacted badly to drugs that no one EVER had reactions to. She was always surprising her doctors and teaching them things by way of her body responding to treatments/procedures/etc differently than they had ever seen. This always served as a reminder to them, over and over, that each body is different.

The tube that was in her throat was thought to be keeping her throat open. As I said, the medical professionals thought once it was removed her throat would collapse. While the tube was hooked up to a ventilator it was rarely breathing for her. She was breathing on her own. Only once in a while — when she was tired — did the machine take over. And most often it was only for a few breaths. So she was able to breathe on her own, it was just an airway issue. Because trachea’s can’t be fixed or transplanted she was told she would die and that she needed to decide when that would be.

Dance Exercise, Nia, Nia at the City of San Jose, Nia classes in the South Bay, Nia Teacher, Nia Class, San Jose Nia, Nia San Jose, Nia workout, Nia, Zumba, PiYo, Gentle YogaShe sat in bed for 10 days contemplating death. All the while she worried about us — did we eat, we should go sleep, etc. She joked with us and allowed us to talk while she listened. The day for the scheduled extubation was stressful and nothing went as planned. In fact it was twelve days after the tube was removed that she died.

I want to emphasize that the hospital staff and my mom’s medical team was very kind and caring and they did all they could to make the dying process “comfortable”. My issue with the process is not with them nor the hospital. As I said, that is another post altogether, but I wanted to explain that she received good care.

We are now able to enter into the grieving stages of “after a loved one dies” . . . because up until now it was a horrific place of limbo. So, if you are able, please keep up all the wonderful stuff you have been doing. Please keep sending positive thoughts and prayers. Throw over that glitter, sparkle, and shine. I have really been lapping it up and I appreciate it so, so, so, so, so, so much.

Make a toast, take a bite, relish the breath . . . . .

Thank you.

Posted in Diane Bacho | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , | 15 Comments »

Rolled Out My Back Pain

Posted by terrepruitt on April 10, 2014

If you have read almost any of my posts you have heard me say that I use my blog as a recipe book and my reminder for things. So today I am writing myself a post about the foam roller. I know I have talked before about using tennis balls to roll out a muscle issue in my back. I actually used a different type of ball – like a huge super ball – because I don’t have any tennis balls, but it helped a lot.  This time it was not a muscle issue. And I am not necessarily recommending this as something you should do. I was a little nervous doing it myself, but I really was getting to the point where I couldn’t tolerate the pain any longer. I couldn’t move my head. Driving to teach my Nia class this morning I was doing the full torso twist as I changed lanes . . . I had to lift away from the seat and turn my whole torso because I could not comfortably turn my head. So I used my foam  roller to roll out my back.

I believe sometimes stress is held in the body. I think that there is a little stress going on right now.  Ya think?  And I believe I am holding my stress of late in my back.  Normally, as I somewhat alluded too above, I might have stress held in the muscles, but this time it was more in my spine. I am more brave when it comes to muscles or connective tissue issues, but a little leery of trying to adjust my spine, but as I said, it was needed. So I laid down on the foam roller so that I could roll it down the length of my spine.

Now I want you to know that if you have back pain you should see a professional. A professional as in a doctor, a chiropractor, an osteopathic physician , etc. Someone that can treat you and your back. If you are familiar with your back issues and you feel comfortable doing this, that is up to you.

So I used it on my back as I did on my hamstrings in my post Roll Out The Hamstring.  But on my back I gingerly rolled on the roller. I started about mid-back,then rolled up, then down. I used my arms to support my weight a bit. Ahhhh, it was fantastic. I moved freely the rest of the day, which was great because I had a Gentle Yoga class to teach tonight.  I also did the vertical stretch shown in my first post about foam rollers, Foam Rollers are COOL!

Well, this might be something that might help you, again, I caution you.  But I know it will help me, but now I just have to remember and that is why I am posting it.  I definitely need a reminder for something occurring during this period of time.

Have you ever used a foam roller?  What do you use them for?  Do they help with massaging your muscles?

Posted in Foam Rollers | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments »

Dwight’s Delicious Dinner

Posted by terrepruitt on April 8, 2014

In a recent post I asked for help with the items I received in my produce box. I received some great ideas. One of them was from a Chef, he is the owner of Burke’s Grill in Douglasville, Georgia. He came up with a great idea to use EVERYTHING in the box in one dish. I never would have thought to do that so I just had to try it. I hope I didn’t ruin his recipe by not having sweet basil. I used marjoram instead. Not the same, but I love it. Also, the wild rice he recommended would have added another layer of flavor but I just used the white rice that I had. His comment of the original idea/recipe is on my post Can’t Come Up With Ideas. Below I have arranged it in more of a recipe format and documented it as I did it.

In his comment he said, “First,this is advice from a chef’s view point. Organize your items from the ground up. Onions, radishes, carrots together.  Then chard alone (it’s special). Then kiwis,grapefruit and apples. Now we are cooking.” Oh yeah, now we are cooking. Here is what I did.

Dance Exercise, Nia, Nia at the City of San Jose, Nia classes in the South Bay, Nia Teacher, Nia Class, San Jose Nia, Nia San Jose, Nia workout, Nia, Zumba, PiYo, Gentle YogaIngredients for Dwight’s Delicious Dinner:

2 white spring onions
2 pippin apples
4 carrots
3 tablespoons of olive oil
1 grapefruit
2 radishes
salt
pepper
1/2 – 1 teaspoon marjoram
balsamic vinegar
1 lb (or so) ground turkey
4 HUGE leaves of rainbow chard
white rice (enough to make a “bed”)
two kiwis

Chop the onion. Cut the apples and carrots into bite size pieces and saute in 1 1/2 tablespoon olive oil until warm. (You don’t want to cook them too much because they are going to be used as a salsa and as an addition to the meat mixture.) After you are done, split the mixture in half. Half will be the salsa used a a topping. The other half will get added to the meat.

While the above is cooking/warming . . . squeeze the grapefruit for the juice.

I used the same pan to cook the turkey, since the mixture is set aside.   Cook the turkey in 1 1/2 tablespoon olive oil until almost done. While it is cooking chop the rainbow chard. When the turkey is almost done add the chard. Salt the chard and stir. Cook this until the turkey is fully cooked and the chard is how you want it to be done.  Dance Exercise, Nia, Nia at the City of San Jose, Nia classes in the South Bay, Nia Teacher, Nia Class, San Jose Nia, Nia San Jose, Nia workout, Nia, Zumba, PiYo, Gentle YogaAdd the half of the onion, apple carrot mixture you are not using as salsa. Then, add a sprinkle of grapefruit juice. Only cook for a few minutes.

WHILE the turkey is cooking, mix half of the onion, apple carrot mixture with the two thinly sliced radishes, salt, pepper, and 1/2-1 teaspoon marjoram, and sprinkle of balsamic vinegar. Let that set. Add the grapefruit juice after it has set for a bit. Using as much as you want to get the right bite you would like. I probably just used a tablespoon.

At some point in all of this you need to cook the rice. We have a rice maker so I usually put it on when there is 20 minutes left of cooking. This time I forgot and my hubby came to the rescue.

Also, peel and slice the kiwis.

Once the rice is done and all is done cooking. Put the rice on your plate, spoon the turkey, chard, onion, apple carrot mixture on top of the rice. Then the onion, apple carrot salsa on top of that. Garnish the dish with the kiwis. But be sure to eat the kiwis WITH the turkey/rice/mixture, the flavors blend perfectly. This was a very happy dish.

Something I really needed. So brilliant. I never would have thought to do this. I never would have thought to add all these flavors together. I love that Dwight came up with something that used EVERYTHING in the box that I received.

Thank you so much, Dwight!!!!!!!

So . . . even if you don’t receive a box with all of these items in it . . . I will tell you it is worth it to get to the store and actually purchase these ingredients and make this dish for yourself. It is like a party for dinner.

Well, what do you think?Dance Exercise, Nia, Nia at the City of San Jose, Nia classes in the South Bay, Nia Teacher, Nia Class, San Jose Nia, Nia San Jose, Nia workout, Nia, Zumba, PiYo, Gentle Yoga

Posted in "Recipes", Food | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , | 8 Comments »

Can’t Come Up With Ideas

Posted by terrepruitt on April 5, 2014

As you may know, I have some things on my mind. The longer it goes on the more difficult it is to function normally. We still receive a small box of organic produce every other week.  Here is what we received in our box this week. I looked at it and thought, “Oh nice.” But not my normal “Ooooooo, what can I do with this and that?  I can do this . . . . . I can do that . . . . ” So I was thinking that perhaps you can help me. I know many of you are good cooks so I was thinking you could give me some ideas on what to with all these lovely fruits and veggies.

Dance Exercise, Nia, Nia at the City of San Jose, Nia classes in the South Bay, Nia Teacher, Nia Class, San Jose Nia, Nia San Jose, Nia workout, Nia, Zumba, PiYo, Gentle YogaRainbow chard
radishes
grapefruit
carrots
kiwis
white spring onions
apples

There is some rainbow chard. What do you do with that? I usually saute it with a little olive oil, garlic, and onions.  More like than not I add it to some ground turkey and then we eat it like that or it can be put on top of rice or put inside a tortilla. Can chard be roasted/baked like kale? Making chard chips?

What about radishes? Are there anything to do with them, but put them in salads? That is what I do with them, put them in salads.

What about grapefruit? Doesn’t seem like my husband or I like them? What do you do with it?

The asparagus is gone. I roasted it.  It was really thick so I peeled the bottom.  I was actually cooking four other things in the oven so I had to use a smaller pan than normal to cook the asparagus so I cut it in half.  The bottom portion I also sliced in half.  It was yummy.  I love asparagus.  I am certain I will receive more, so maybe I should get your ideas on how to cook that now.

What about carrots? Again I put them in salads, raw. What about you?  I don’t like them candied, so that is a recipe I can skip.

How about kiwis? Do you just eat them?  My husband just eat them. They are another thing I would put on salads. Do you have others ideas on how to use them?

Ooooooo and the new-to-me white spring onions. Should they be cooked whole and eaten that way or used as I would a regular onion?

What about apples? Seems as if we get them in every box? Sometimes they just stack up. I like really CRISP sweet apples and some times the apples we get are not crisp – they are the mushy kind – so I don’t like to just eat them. Last night I used one I had from the last box to male my hubby a “Porky-Pork Chop”. What do you do with hem? I guess I could just bake ‘em, huh?

I also know that I can use the carrot greens in a smoothie but I have never done that.  Can the radish greens be used too?

So help me out.  Think for me because with this whole process dragging on I am starting to get a little worn out and the everyday things are not so everyday.

Posted in Food | Tagged: , , , , , , , , | 11 Comments »

Death Watch Continued

Posted by terrepruitt on April 3, 2014

Well, I didn’t want to turn this into a blog about death, but I have so many wonderful people asking me what is going on it is just so much more efficient for me to write it out. It saves time and heartache . . . I can just give one update and then point people to this. I don’t have to keep repeating myself. This is turning out not at all how we were told it would turn out. Which is really starting to annoy me because with everything that is now happening the medical staff is saying, “Oh that happens, sometimes.” Really? Well, no one told us that all this stuff might happen.

My mom has cancer. The size of her trachea has been reduced due to the cancer. The thought was that it would be reduced and damaged even further by the tube’s insertion and extubation. She had a tube in her throat for 10 days. The tube was connected to a ventilator but it was rarely breathing for her. For most of the 10 days she was breathing on her own, but the medical professionals felt that she would not be able to breathe without the tube. So when they told her she needed to pick a day on which they removed it the feelings were that not long after that she would die. But that has not been the case. The tube was removed at 2:28 pm on Monday, March 31, 2014 and she is still breathing on her own, today is Thursday, April 3, 2014.

Some of the “stuff” we were not aware of that could happen, the stuff my dad keeps being told sometimes happens is she is waking up. She wakes up and talks to him. One time it was for two hours (I think that was Wednesday). The nurses say she talks to them. She responds to inquiries about specific meds. She says thank you when then rearrange her. Her brain is not damaged nor is she in a coma, so she wakes up.

She is not hooked up to anything, but an IV for fluids. She gets fluids and meds. But she is wasting away . . . as happens to a body that does not get food after six days. A slow drawn out death.

I didn’t know that she would wake up and have moments of lucid consciousness. I thought the drugs they administer would keep her unconscious. So I am kind of annoyed that I am missing it. But at the same time I was happy that it was a couple of hours that my dad was able to spend with her. Alone. She was sad that they didn’t make it to their 50th wedding anniversary. That would have been 2015. There are many other things she was sad about but that was one thing she shared. I came home because I was under the impression that it would not go on this long. I was also under the impression that she would just sleep until the end.

Everyone copes differently . . . some of us continue on with our lives while other shut down. Shutting themselves away to wallow in sorrow. How people cope is a personal thing. Neither is right or wrong . . . it is just how we deal. I have been lifted up by teaching my classes and moving. My Nia students care and are supporting me. One of my yoga classes, the students don’t know. In one class where I was just subbing they didn’t know, but the peace and serenity in which they practiced REALLY helped me. It was so lovely to see their faces while they held their poses.

If it is not too much trouble, please keep your prayers and positive thoughts coming. They really are a source of strength to me.

Feel free to comment.

Posted in Diane Bacho | Tagged: , , , , , , , , | 20 Comments »

Doesn’t Mean You Die Even When You Decide To

Posted by terrepruitt on April 1, 2014

HOLY MOLY!!!! Sigh. Ok, I feel that since I started it, I need to continue with it. Right? I mean, it is not my intention to make my blog all about death, but since I asked for love and support, I think it is only fair that I give you all an update. I sat with my mother in her hospital room for roughly seven days. During that time she was presented with an option that would have been extremely painful and risky. The surgeon gave three scenarios that could occur and two of them pretty much ended with immediate death, so she opted to skip the procedure and just spend her last days with a tube down her throat, unable to speak and unable to cry. She entertained visitors. Not many because it was exhausting to her. She also was asked to pick the day on which she would have the tube removed. The thoughts were that her trachea is so encroached with cancer and would be so traumatized by the tube that when they pulled it out she would not have much time before she died.

Regarding the procedure mentioned — for those that are curious — it was a stent. A stent was to be placed in the trachea. The idea was that it would hold open the collapsing trachea so that she could breathe. But, it would only be for a few days. The stent is not a permanent or even semi-permanent solution. It is also metal and rigid, it would not have flexed and moved. It would have been very uncomfortable/painful, because the trachea moves.

She did not want to go. She had a lot left she wanted to do. Knowing she couldn’t do ALL that she wanted to do before she died, she thought she could at least do SOMETHINGS. So she decided to have the tube removed on Monday. She made that decision on a Wednesday. It is MY belief that if she knew all that she would have to go through between Wednesday, March 26th, and Monday, March 31st she would not have picked that day. But she wanted to at least get her Easter cards written out. She also wanted to advise me of who gets what in the stack of Christmas gifts she already bought. She also wanted to spend as much time with her family as she could — who wouldn’t, right? But in order to do so she suffered a lot. The medical professionals taking care of her were always there to administer the drugs she needed so she wouldn’t be in pain, but those drugs made her groggy and unable to think clearly so sometimes I think she held off a bit. Plus the procedures that need to be done to allow someone to breath through a tube are not comfortable. So anyway . . .

Hand holding - for post 04.01.14We got to visit for several days. As I have said several times, she was unable to talk with the tube in her throat. She also was unable to cry because the contractions that happen when one cries caused too much pain. Normally I would not tell someone not to cry because crying is such a great release. I believe crying is good for the BMES – ha, yes, that is a Nia acronym. It helps clear the tear ducts and allows for a physical release. Crying helps clear the mind also. It is an emotional release as well as a spirit helper so to me, it is a good thing. So if you want to cry, cry — except while you are driving or you have tube down your throat and it hurts too much.

I was there until Friday night. I got home around midnight on Friday. I came home to do some laundry, teach a yoga class, do some paper work, and pick up my husband. We went back up Saturday night. We visited all day Sunday and waited around for 1:00 pm on Monday. We all were under the impression that at 1:00 pm it would happen. But we all forgot that “hospital time” is not exact. They do things — even scheduled things — around other things. So our 1:00 pm scheduled extubation turned into 2:28 pm. I trusted the medical staff (although it turned out not to be who we were told it would be) would see that she was not in pain, but we still didn’t know if there would be any gasping and gagging and who knows. I was confident that it would not be a long time after. I saw the MRI of the trachea/esophagus area. Nurses and doctors helped convince me that it would be quick. Well it was not. We are going into our 29th hour.  While my mom is so medicated she doesn’t know what is going on and she feels no pain . . . this is NOT what she would have wanted. Lingering on. In fact every visitor that came to visit her while I was there, her answer to their comment of “I’m praying for you.” was “Pray that I don’t linger.” Again, I am at a loss.

Yes, we all have ideas as to why she has not died . . . . she is not ready . . . . she is doing it in her own time (something we call Natural Time in Nia) . . . ALL TYPES of ideas . . . but really we don’t know. All that I know is that this is really hard on my dad. This is not a case where she might revive and be ok. This is not a hopeful, “Oh, I’ll sit by your bedside until you are awake.” This is a grueling death watch. Judge me anyway you want, I left last night. I didn’t want to see her as I know she would not want to be. I didn’t want to hear the “death rattle”. Ugh!  Since it is hard on my dad, if it drags on until the weekend I will go back up.

Well, this post is way longer than I like to have my post, but I really wanted to let you know what the status is. Also . . . I guess it helps to write it out. One more thing . . . I believe that I would not have been able to handle this if it weren’t for all of you. So many people have “come out of the wood work” to share and support and deliver sparkles. So thank you all for sharing and caring and giving. I have not been told I am loved or said, “I love you” this much in as many days before in my life.

Please keep up with those thoughts, prayers, stories, sparkles, and all that jazz.  It REALLY helps!

 

Posted in Diane Bacho | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , | 24 Comments »

Really? The Goodie Jar?

Posted by terrepruitt on March 29, 2014

I had started a post telling the story of my mom’s last few years but then I had to go be with her. It was the first half of Deciding On Death. I was trying to finish it today, but I have to go. I have to get to her.

I realized as I was typing the title Deciding On Death that it might make people think my mom decided to die instead of stay alive. But that really was not the case earlier this week. She was told by the doctors that she had to pick the day. So a more accurate title would have been Deciding Which Day To Die.

Anyway . . . you might be wondering how I can be thinking about a Goodie Jar when faced with this awful thing. Well, I will tell you. First of all everyone deals with death differently. I’ve know this, but I very much experienced when my mother-in-law died. We all have our own way.

The way we are having to go through this is really awful and hard, but death is a part of life. We all die. Period. There is no getting around that.

For me, I have faith. I have faith in a plan, I have faith in an after life, I have faith in God. My mom, is really strong and is just being amazing . . . . she is helping us through this. I am also keeping really busy. I have also turned to my social network. I have an idea that when a loved one dies most people want to shout it out, most people want the world to know their pain — for whatever reason —- and I wanted to shout it out, so I did. And let me tell you, best thing I did! BEST. THING.

At one moment I was peaceful. Then someone shared an issue with me and wanted me to deal with it — even though it was not MY issue it was theirs and someone else’s — and that raised my stress level. Then I looked at my phone and saw an unfamiliar number. I thought it was a sales call but decided to listen to it anyway. And — SNAP! — Right then and there two seconds after I heard the voice and Jill announced her name, I was calmed. I was FILLED to the brim with joy. She has a beautiful voice and I had NEVER HEARD IT BEFORE. Her voice calmed me. Her words filled me. I am loved. I am supported. I said to myself, “HECK YEAH!” Because I had hesitated before I posted and then — BAM! — right away, the return was fabulous. I was transported into a good place.

And it is continuing to come. I am getting love, support, all the sparkles I asked for. I am getting stories about my mom. Stuff I didn’t know that is really cool to know. I just commented on my blog post to someone, “I guess they don’t call it support for nothing! ;-)”

So, remember all this time I have been telling you that the Goodie Jar is to remind us to take a moment to look at the good even though there is “other stuff”. Yeah, I wasn’t just blowing smoke people. There is ALWAYS good. And — for me, I am not saying that anyone else has to do this, this is ME, for me, myself and I — I HAVE to look at the good. I have to focus on the positive otherwise you would need a huge SHAM-WOW to mop up a huge Terre-size puddle that was on the floor!

So everyone of you that has taken time to share a story, send uber goodness at me and my family — YOU are all going in my Goodie Jar! I am ready to transfer to a bigger container now. Thank you.

(Monday, March 31, 2014, 1:00 pm)

What are YOU putting in your Goodie Jar?

 

PS  -  I reserve the right to become a puddle.  :-)

Posted in Diane Bacho, Good Things in the Goodie Jar, Misc | Tagged: , , , , , , , | 8 Comments »