So, I have not posted a few times when I normally would have. I was really going to make a huge effort to post on all my self-imposed scheduled days this month. The Friday Photos are really helping. I was confident I could do it, even with all of the Holidays. I know that I can at least post on Friday even if I can’t think of anything to write because it is just a picture. The 11th was a Holiday, Veteran’s Day, and I had planned to be out of town, but I was going to have it all set up to go. I was going to be out of town taking my dad to his surgery for cataracts. My hubby and I were going to leave late Thursday night to take my dad to an early appointment on Friday. But on Tuesday a call from a neighbor had me concerned so I was going to go to my dad’s and see what was up then come home Wednesday, teach my Nia and stretch class on Thursday and get ready to be gone for the weekend. But, I got a surprise when I got to my dad’s house. He was not alive. My dad was dead. It was completely unbelievable. I am still having a hard time believing it. I still stop and think, “Wait. What?” So here I am writing about death . . . again.
I was just starting to feel really sad about my mom’s death, really feeling the loss, yet at the same time I felt like I was starting to be able to find that bubbly joy again. Sounds odd and contradictory, but that is what I was feeling. For me, it is almost as if for the first few months I could just say that I hadn’t seen her in a while. Ya know, life gets busy . . . it has just been a while since I was able to visit. Then after a year or so I really started to miss her . . . I couldn’t act as if it has just “been a while” since we visited. Then recently I was really missing her. It has been way too long since I heard her voice or seen her or gotten a hug from her. It is as if the missing of her was settling in to my body. At the same time I felt like there were days where my dance was just bursting with joy.
And now here I am in a shocker of a situation.
So I am busy dealing with death. This one is all on me. So I might be absent from my blog a bit more than usual. Or I just might be posting about death a lot. Or I might just stick to cat stuff for a while. Cat stuff is easy. There are always pictures to post of cats. Our cats are awesome and while there might not always be a cute or funny story to tell there are always tons of pictures that I could post.
Sigh.
Terre Pruitt's Blog 