Let Love Be Your Ears
Posted by terrepruitt on November 17, 2011
A Nia student of mine reminded me of something after a Nia Class the other day. She said her daily meditation said to speak with love AND to listen with love. I have heard that before I believe, either someone posted it on Facebook or a friend posted about it on her blog. I can’t remember. The speaking with love is not always easy, but I think of it as a more common thought, a more common instruction. It can be compared to the old adage “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.” A well-remembered saying. Somewhat similar. Speaking with love would be saying nice things. But the listening with love or the hearing with love, that is a little less common of an instruction. I have not heard that one for as long as I can remember as I have heard the other one. I also think it is more difficult to do than to speak with love. I mean, like the old saying says, don’t say anything if you can’t be nice. But it is difficult not to hear someone. If someone is talking you general listen and hear them, but it could be a challenge to do it with love.
We all take our experiences into situations. Our thoughts and actions are based upon our past and what we know. So I believe that we hear and listen the same way. If someone has been in relationships where their partner has lied to them, then they might hear a lie in everything. They might be listening with distrust and anger, not love. If someone is having a bad day and someone says, “Have a nice day.” they might hear it as sarcasm. Whatever it is that we are feeling, thinking, and experiencing at the moment it can definitely “cloud” how we hear things. If we are not conscious of how we are listening we can make something out of nothing. If we hear and listen in anger, we could respond accordingly and cause a fight or hurt feelings. It is not easy to always listen with love. We all have “stuff” going on in our lives. Some of this “stuff” can make us sensitive and this sensitivity can possible make us read into things. Listen with love is a practice.
I can’t remember if what I am talking about was the focus of my friend’s blog post, but I do remember my comment including the association between what she was saying and the four agreements. Listening/hearing with love reminds me of “not taking things personal”. “Things” as I mentioned. If there is something going on in my life that is making me upset, I might listen and hear things in a negative way. Or if someone else is having a bad day and I am not listening with love, I might not stop to think, “Hey, maybe this person is having a bad day and instead of snapping meanly back at them, I should remember that we all have bad days.”
Clearly there are different ways we can take “listen with love”. When I hear that, these are two ways that occur to me. What do you think of when you hear, “listen with love”?
Terre Pruitt's Blog 
niachick said
Another beautiful blog post. Listen with love for me has really nothing to do with “hearing” what the person is saying with my ears. It is listening energetically and vibrationally to the intent behind what is being said and allowing myself to avoid judgment and simply “love” for the sake of love, letting my heart do the listening.
I know so many folks (my husband for one…and I do it, too) that begin to form an opinion and a response before the person speaking can even complete the words they wish to say. It’s really sad that we as human beings cannot learn to listen with love ALL the time. There would be so much less ugliness in the world.
Thank you Terre!
Listening with love,
Jill
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terrepruitt said
Ah-ha! See? Another way of interpreting “listen with love”!
Oh, the “forming of an opinion” is something we all do. I think of “silencing the inner dialog” to work on keeping from doing that. When someone is talking and I start thinking I start having that inner dialog, it is difficult to listen. Right? Difficult to listen to two people at once.
“Silencing the inner dialog” another tidbit I learned about in my Nia intensive!
I hear ya! 🙂
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Donna said
Listening with love comes in so many ways, when I am busy at work and someone comes in with an issue and I need to stop and listen. Hard to do with love. When someone calls and is angry and verbzlizing that in a way that is hard to hear, listening with love is very hard. It is much easier to react in these kind of situtations, but does not foster self love or respect when reaction is the choice. Thanks Terre for the thoughts.
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terrepruitt said
Oh lookey here! You are here! How exciting. Thank you.
And YES, what you said. Listening with love comes in so many ways. AND it is not always easy to do.
I greatly appreciate the reminder to practice it!
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