Have you seen the meme that says “Don’t get confused between my personality and my attitude. My personality is who I am, my attitude depends on who you are.”? I see it on Facebook a lot. When I first saw it I agreed with it. I laughed and thought, “Oh yeah. I can see that.” I am going through my day and encounter someone who is being an ass and I give some grump right back at them. But I saw it again yesterday and I realized I don’t agree with it. While there might be confusion between personality and attitude, I still am in control of both of mine. I realized that my attitude is a reflection of my personality and I don’t want to be an ass. I especially don’t want to be grumpy just because the person I am dealing with is grumpy. I don’t know their story. I have no idea what is going on in their life. I am not saying that it is right for them to treat me poorly because they have “stuff” going on, but it does happen. People get distracted and caught up, but that does not mean I have to get caught up in that. I am in control of both my personality AND my attitude.
I am still the one that has a say. My attitude is still in my control. I don’t have to react to the other person’s bad/rude attitude. THEIR attitude is a reflection of themselves and what is going on in THEIR life . . . my attitude does not have to reflect their attitude. My attitude reflects myself, my personality. I don’t have to be involved in their attitude. Oh, it is not always easy. I am not saying it is. Especially when I have my own “stuff” going on. I can be thinking about what is happening in my life and the suffering of those I love and not be prepared for someone’s guff. At those time it is easy to have my guard down and just let myself get swooped up in that “chicken-head-attitude”, but that is not my personality. Not getting caught up and not letting someone “get the best of me” is a practice. I believe it is part of not taking things personally and listening with love. Not taking things personally is one of the Energy Allies we have in Nia, you might know it as one of the Four Agreements. Listening with love is something one of my students reminded me of.
Sometimes the attitude encountered could just be of indifference, not even necessarily rude or grumpy, but just the “I don’t care” and when that is coming from someone in customer service it is annoying, but no matter what their attitude is, I am the one that has control over me. My personality dictates MY attitude. So I can choose to NOT be a reflection of their poor attitude (and customer service).
So here is my meme. A reminder to myself that I am in control of me. I am in control of my personality. I am in control of my attitude. I am in control of the energy I put out into the world.
What about you? Are you in control of your attitude or are you going to let someone else dictate that for you?
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