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Don’t Get Confused, I Am In Control

Posted by terrepruitt on January 28, 2014

Have you seen the meme that says “Don’t get confused between my personality and my attitude.  My personality is who I am, my attitude depends on who you are.”?  I see it on Facebook a lot.  When I first saw it I agreed with it.  I laughed and thought, “Oh yeah.  I can see that.”   I am going through my day and encounter someone who is being an ass and I give some grump right back at them.  But I saw it again yesterday and I realized I don’t agree with it.  While there might be confusion between personality and attitude, I still am in control of both of mine.  I realized that my attitude is a reflection of my personality and I don’t want to be an ass.  I especially don’t want to be grumpy just because the person I am dealing with is grumpy.  I don’t know their story.  I have no idea what is going on in their life.  I am not saying that it is right for them to treat me poorly because they have “stuff” going on, but it does happen.  People get distracted and caught up, but that does not mean I have to get caught up in that.  I am in control of both my personality AND my attitude.

I am still the one that has a say.  My attitude is still in my control.  I don’t have to react to the other person’s bad/rude attitude.  THEIR attitude is a reflection of themselves and what is going on in THEIR life . . . my attitude does not have to reflect their attitude.  My attitude reflects myself, my personality.  I don’t have to be involved in their attitude.  Oh, it is not always easy.  I am not saying it is.  Especially when I have my own “stuff” going on.  I can be thinking about what is happening in my life and the suffering of those I love and not be prepared for someone’s guff.  At those time it is easy to have my guard down and just let myself get swooped up in that “chicken-head-attitude”, but that is not my personality.  Not getting caught up and not letting someone “get the best of me” is a practice.  I believe it is part of not taking things personally and listening with love.  Not taking things personally is one of the Energy Allies we have in Nia, you might know it as one of the Four Agreements.  Listening with love is something one of my students reminded me of.

Sometimes the attitude encountered could just be of indifference, not even necessarily rude or grumpy, but just the “I don’t care” and when that is coming from someone in customer service it is annoying, but no matter what their attitude is, I am the one that has control over me.  My personality dictates MY attitude.  So I can choose to NOT be a reflection of their poor attitude (and customer service).

So here is my meme.  A reminder to myself that I am in control of me.  I am in control of my personality.  I am in control of my attitude.  I am in control of the energy I put out into the world.

What about you?  Are you in control of your attitude or are you going to let someone else dictate that for you?Dance Exercise, Nia, Nia at the City of San Jose, Nia classes in the South Bay, Nia Teacher, Nia Class, San Jose Nia, Nia San Jose, Nia workout, Nia, Zumba, PiYo, Gentle Yoga

7 Responses to “Don’t Get Confused, I Am In Control”

  1. Stacy B said

    I couldn’t agree with this more!!!!!


    • Yay! Thanks. I am glad you get it and agree. I know I don’t always do it (not let THEIR attitude and personality affect me, but I try and) I am going to keep trying.

      Sweet. Potato. Caramel.


  2. niachick said

    I’m delighted that you saw that quote differently than some. My personality is not who I am, it is not my identity. Neither is my attitude. Both are part of my ego which is the human part of my beingness. I am spirit in action…that is my identity. I am not my body, I am not my emotions, I am not my mind. Those capacities are what I have through which I express the truth of who I am. Some folks see themselves as their personality…which IMHO is very limiting. We are so much more than that. And attitudes…a whole ‘nother animal. It comes down to choices. Like you said, another person’s attitude should not affect your own. An attitude of gratitude in every moment is a beautiful thing. I love you!


    • My personality is who I am, but that is not to say that is my limit. I can be more, however it is still who I am. I see you state you believe people seeing themselves as personality is limiting, but I don’t. I think of my personality as containing all that you mention so IMO, there is no limit. Could be we are saying the same thing just using different words . . . not sure, but either way, I so appreciate you reading and commenting. Thanks.

      I will think on this more.


      • So basically at the core of it — whether you are “personality” or whether your think of yourself as “spirit” the point of my post is that I don’t have to allow the other person (personality/spirit/attitude/emotion) dictate the way I act or feel or conduct myself. The original saying — to me — was an indication that I give up my power and control over myself depending on you . . . . so I could normally be a nice person but if you are an ass then I will be one too, and — as I said in my post . . . that’s not how I want to be.

        Not sure if you agree with that portion of it because I sensed you were explaining the part that you are not personality or any of that stuff because you are a spirit in action. Not sure if the action your spirit takes is based on the other person or not.

        Love you, too!


        • niachick said

          To clarify my response: my personality is PART of my expression….it is not who I am regardless of who comes in to my world. You’re right, I do not have to allow another person to dictate the way I act or feel. Thanks!


          • Ah-ha! Got it. I was thinking that you would be you no matter who the other person was. 🙂

            MUAH!!! Thank you so much for taking the time to read my posts and comment!

            Hey . . . I hope you feel better!


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