Terre Pruitt's Blog

In the realm of health, wellness, fitness, and the like, or whatever inspires me.

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Posts Tagged ‘mom’

Date Of Death

Posted by terrepruitt on March 31, 2021

I think I swore I would remember this year, but I think I forgot . . . or almost. Who really knows, right? I think about five or six days before I started feeling “off”. I have switched up my workout routine so I was thinking it was maybe that. I always look at what I have eaten. I thought maybe it was that. I have not been great about drinking (what I consider to be) enough water so I was thinking it could be that. Then two or three days later I just was feeling “icky” I kept looking at all of the aforementioned things but none of that seemed right as the reason for my “off” feelings. One thing that is so frustrating or baffling . . . depending on the moment of introspection . . . is that the feeling or sensation is so difficult to describe. It is a feeling of doom or dread or sadness or just screw-it-all that just does not make sense, combined with confusion and indecision and some giddiness and grumpiness pretty much all at once. And the physical sensation is an ache in the stomach . . . no, the back . . . no, right under the ribs . . . no, the heart . . . no, the spine . . . no, the . . . get what I am saying? And not always just an ache, but a stab or tingling or a dryness or a sweaty-ness. Basically it is just OFF. And, again, when everything is examined there isn’t really anything exact to point out to account for this . . . but . . AH HA!

 Terre Pruitt, Nia Teacher, online exercise classes, www.HelpYouWell.com, www.TerrePruitt.com, Nia Technique, yoga, stretch, virtual exercise class, Zoom Classes, dance exercise

Communicated via writing and heavily medicated

So, my mom’s death certificate states 04/11/14, but that is not the date she picked. She picked March 31. She had a mangled esophagus, partly due to delayed diagnosed cancer and partly due to a medical error, but when she went into the hospital on March 22, 2014 she didn’t know that she would not be leaving and that when they placed a tube in her throat to allow her to breath she would have to pick the day they took it out telling her that is the day she would die. Well, she didn’t die die on March 31st, but she was gone then. They removed the tube and put her in a medical coma so that we could watch her die slowly for the next 10 days.

I have stated before the body knows trauma. I had posted about it in a complete different context, but I think death of a loved one is trauma and I think the body remembers it. And even though the death certificate states 04/11/14 because that is when her heart stopped she was actually gone from us when they put her to sleep and removed the tubes.

So, I think that I get a feeling of doom or dread or sadness or just screw-it-all that just does not make sense, combined with confusion and indecision and some giddiness and grumpiness pretty much all at once. And I physically sense an ache in my stomach . . . no, my back . . . no, right under my ribs . . . no, my heart . . . no, my spine, no . . . accompanied by a stab or tingling or a dryness or a moistness. I think you may get what I am saying. 

I also think sitting at home and not being able to be out and about and seeing friends and family might have exacerbated “things” this year.

I believe that many of you may feel the same way . . . and maybe many of you can’t put your finger on it. But now maybe we will remember. 

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Posted in Diane Bacho | Tagged: , , , | 4 Comments »

Miss You, Lady

Posted by terrepruitt on January 29, 2020

I wrote a post and as I was editing the pictures that I was going to use when I realized I should just stop and say that today is my mom’s birthday. It is a drag she is not here to get the wishes and the love everyone would have to give her. She is missed.

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Posted in Diane Bacho | Tagged: , , , | 4 Comments »

Five Years

Posted by terrepruitt on April 12, 2019

It never feels right just letting the day pass without a mention. And I know the day has passed, but I thought I would post a picture of my mom for my Friday Photo. It has been five years. Whenever I go looking for photos, I get sad because we really didn’t take that many. We often just hung out and didn’t get made-up and we both always wanted to at least have hair and make-up done in photos – silly, I know – so I don’t have a lot.

1948 to April 11, 2014

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Posted in Friday Photo | Tagged: , , | 8 Comments »

Mom’s Amaryllis

Posted by terrepruitt on May 25, 2018

These bloom every year. They are so beautiful. My husband’s mom gave them to him to look after while she was away. Sadly, she was not able to return to take them back. They are a great reminder of a beautiful mother. This was taken at the end of April. They stayed until the middle of May.

Amaryllis as the Friday Photo.

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Posted in Friday Photo | Tagged: , , , , | 2 Comments »

She Wanted A Party

Posted by terrepruitt on August 9, 2014

Front of Mom's Celebration Invitation for blog postToday we had a celebration event for my mom. Saturday, August 09, 2014.  I am writing this before hand so that I can schedule it to post and not have to think about it on Saturday.  I am writing it as if it already happened.  I will have it post AFTER the event, so it will be over and this will not be construed as an invitation to the event.  Even though this is a picture of the actual invitation to the event.

Even though, I don’t want my blog to turn into a blog about death and dying, as I have said before.  There have been a few deaths this year so there will be more posts.  I would like to eventually share more of my mom’s story because she went through a lot and I feel I want to brag about how brave she was.  Plus, if you have read a few of the related posts you know writing about things is my pressure valve because I still have very angry feelings about how we expect humans to die.

In addition to sharing her story, I will probably have pictures of the celebration to share with you and words to write about how wonderful it was.  I will be so glad when it is over as planning it has been so very stressful and time consuming.  It is impossible to please everyone so I don’t bother trying . . . but this was not my event to plan.  And as you may know, grief tends to cloud one’s thinking, making decisions difficult.  I think it has a lot to do with the fact that there is so much thinking — too much thinking . . . well, that can be left for a separate post.  I have faith that everything was perfect and no stress was required.

My mom is worth Back of Mom's Celebration Invitation for post Day of COLcelebrating.  And a loving crowd was invited to gather to share stories, to laugh, to live, to “eat-drink-and-be-merry”, as the saying goes.  Our merry is in tribute because that is what she wanted.  “Celebrate” and “purple” was the idea.  She wanted us to have a party and we added the purple because that was her favorite color.

Monday, August 11, 2014 will mark four months since her death.

If you have a story with my mom in it and you would like to share, please go to her Memorial page and share in the comments.  (Click here!)

 

 

 

 

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Dance Exercise, Nia, Nia at the City of San Jose, Nia classes in the South Bay, Nia Teacher, Nia Class, San Jose Nia, Nia San Jose, Nia workout, Nia, Zumba, PiYo, Gentle Yoga, Group Ex City of San Jose, San Jose Group Ex classes

Dance Exercise, Nia, Nia at the City of San Jose, Nia classes in the South Bay, Nia Teacher, Nia Class, San Jose Nia, Nia San Jose, Nia workout, Nia, Zumba, PiYo, Gentle Yoga, Group Ex City of San Jose, San Jose Group Ex classes

Posted in Diane Bacho | Tagged: , , , | 10 Comments »

Really? The Goodie Jar?

Posted by terrepruitt on March 29, 2014

I had started a post telling the story of my mom’s last few years but then I had to go be with her. It was the first half of Deciding On Death. I was trying to finish it today, but I have to go. I have to get to her.

I realized as I was typing the title Deciding On Death that it might make people think my mom decided to die instead of stay alive. But that really was not the case earlier this week. She was told by the doctors that she had to pick the day. So a more accurate title would have been Deciding Which Day To Die.

Anyway . . . you might be wondering how I can be thinking about a Goodie Jar when faced with this awful thing. Well, I will tell you. First of all everyone deals with death differently. I’ve know this, but I very much experienced when my mother-in-law died. We all have our own way.

The way we are having to go through this is really awful and hard, but death is a part of life. We all die. Period. There is no getting around that.

For me, I have faith. I have faith in a plan, I have faith in an after life, I have faith in God. My mom, is really strong and is just being amazing . . . . she is helping us through this. I am also keeping really busy. I have also turned to my social network. I have an idea that when a loved one dies most people want to shout it out, most people want the world to know their pain — for whatever reason —- and I wanted to shout it out, so I did. And let me tell you, best thing I did! BEST. THING.

At one moment I was peaceful. Then someone shared an issue with me and wanted me to deal with it — even though it was not MY issue it was theirs and someone else’s — and that raised my stress level. Then I looked at my phone and saw an unfamiliar number. I thought it was a sales call but decided to listen to it anyway. And — SNAP! — Right then and there two seconds after I heard the voice and Jill announced her name, I was calmed. I was FILLED to the brim with joy. She has a beautiful voice and I had NEVER HEARD IT BEFORE. Her voice calmed me. Her words filled me. I am loved. I am supported. I said to myself, “HECK YEAH!” Because I had hesitated before I posted and then — BAM! — right away, the return was fabulous. I was transported into a good place.

And it is continuing to come. I am getting love, support, all the sparkles I asked for. I am getting stories about my mom. Stuff I didn’t know that is really cool to know. I just commented on my blog post to someone, “I guess they don’t call it support for nothing! ;-)”

So, remember all this time I have been telling you that the Goodie Jar is to remind us to take a moment to look at the good even though there is “other stuff”. Yeah, I wasn’t just blowing smoke people. There is ALWAYS good. And — for me, I am not saying that anyone else has to do this, this is ME, for me, myself and I — I HAVE to look at the good. I have to focus on the positive otherwise you would need a huge SHAM-WOW to mop up a huge Terre-size puddle that was on the floor!

So everyone of you that has taken time to share a story, send uber goodness at me and my family — YOU are all going in my Goodie Jar! I am ready to transfer to a bigger container now. Thank you.

(Monday, March 31, 2014, 1:00 pm)

What are YOU putting in your Goodie Jar?

 

PS  –  I reserve the right to become a puddle.  🙂

Posted in Diane Bacho, Good Things in the Goodie Jar, Misc | Tagged: , , , , , , , | 8 Comments »